Favorite Quotes

(when the old site crashed)
It's like losing a family member... only worse
Nlinc
LET'S SAVE SOME BABIES! DAG, Loveline
People say money isn't everything, but it really is. sWs 2004
I'm gonna teach my kids to just defecate like animals if someone were to start touching them inappropriately. Adam Carolla, Loveline
FAUST SICH!!! sWs 2004
In principal it's wrong, but in practice it's funny. sWs 2004
As everyone knows, it is my job to pass judgement on everyone else and never take a look at myself. Adam Corolla, Loveline
oyvind: what''s a vegan?
junk: something you should stab in the face
Bash.org
I'd pay $100 US to shoot a cow with a rocket launcher. Bash.org
(While committing suicide) Oh, hang on... I missed. Winter
Winter: How bout you let me see that catalog?
Nlinc: How bout you put your FIST IN YOUR ASS!!!
sWs Dialog, 2004
...and that is the only other time I've ever pushed a woman out of a tree. Unknown
Every time you punch a hippie in the face, Baby Jesus smiles. Frank J.
He doesn’t ever have psychotic episodes, except very rarely. LL Caller
The French love internal conflict, because no matter who wins, sombody French gets to retreat. MJohn3006
sWs: Not there when you need us, there when you don't. sWs Team Slogan, 2004
The only reason you're still concious is because I don't feel like carrying you. Now get in the van. Jack Bauer, "24"
I have two SureFires. One is my G2 Nitrolon and the other is my DPMS M4. Winter
We're gonna eat like dingoes in a maternity ward!!! Adam Carolla as "Spanky Ham"
I wanted to get my foot in the door... before I kicked it down! Nlinc
Just remember: There are no written rules. sWs
Why a suppressor? "So when I shoot an intruder I won't wake up the kids." Unknown
If I cared what people thought, I would pretend to like .223. Winter
You're about as useful as a poopy flavored lolly pop. Patches O'Houlihan
Kate, it's time for you to put your mouth where our balls are. Peter La Fleur
The Pony Express: When it absolutely HAS to be there in three or four months or so. Tom Servo
They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat. Short summary of every Jewish holiday
60% of the time, it works every time. Brian Fantana
(After Tsunamis)
Winter: There's what, 6 billion people in the world?
Nlinc: Well there's slightly less now!
(Laughter)
sWs Dialog, 2004
Oh, tragedy is so funny, I know. Winter
Ech! You're old enough to be my mom!
And you're fat enough to be my car. So what?
The Critic
Hate's no fun if you keep it to yourself. Unknown
The best part of waking up, is cordite in your cup... Folgers' Theme, with a twist...
(asking about shipping a package)
Nlinc: Should I do [shipping] insurance?
Winter: Nah. Only if you're shipping NFA... or human cargo.
Nlinc: LOL
Winter: Don't laugh, this is serious.
Nlinc: Hahhaha!
sWs Dialog, 2005
I want my apology back! Adam Carolla
Everybody makes mistakes, especially you. Unknown
If I wanted efficency, I''d put bigger tires on my truck, so I could get the whole cat in one pass. Unknown
The French are a bunch of Cheese-eating surrender monkies! Simpsons
I was in gymnastics til I realized that fat chicks cause earthquakes unchali
IRAQ! You NEED to send it to IRAQ! Unknown
In other words, lie, lie, lie! As long as you lie auf Deutsch! Nikki
Remember: All rental cars are off-road vehicles. Photokirk
Well hell, you've got two of em anyway. I say go for it. Mr45Auto
No! I want a poo pond regatta! Stagz
Keep shooting til he stops twitching. Dispatching {YBBS}BiGMaC
5.56 just won't cut it. Winter
I've... never really cared for less-than-lethal. It's really just the long way of getting to lethal. Winter
Single sucks. Double tap everytime. Unknown
Since we miss 60% of the time, we don't see overpenetration of the target as a problem. FBI
One test is worth a thousand expert opinions. H.P. White Labs
GENTLEMEN! YOU CAN'T FIGHT IN HERE! THIS IS THE WAR ROOM! President Merkin Muffley, "Dr. Strangelove"
Yo homey? Is that my briefcase? Vincent, "Collateral"
Strobe lights make running targets look like they are standing still so you can shoot them easier. pale_pony
What happens in Jew school, stays in Jew school  
We're talking about your wife being in a coma, and you're watching your girlfriend in a tennis match. PHS
When a lady laughs, and I can't slap her for it, what am I supposed to do? Santos, "PHS"
You say that again, and I'm going to reach through the phone and slap you. Santos, "PHS"
War...War... Gotta get some! R.C. Collins, "PHS"
Prestige series, BITCH! Winter loves his guitars.
I got a mail-order bride. She's a Christian Children's Fund recipient! Winter
Me: "I'd like some .45 ammo."
Employee: "You want target ammo or people ammo?"
Me: "People ammo please."
Friend: "Um...
Unknown
Man, this isn't a job for Jesus, this is a job for an attorney. Mr. Steve Bosell, "PHS"
I saw "3 Kings" 11 times. I know what desert is like. R. C. Collins, "PHS"
I talked to about 100 teens, and I only really had to slap 3 of them. Doug Danger, "PHS"
Yeah, you know why? Cause those women won't shave! Doug Danger, "PHS"
I once wore pants to church 4 Sundays in a row. If that's not lesbian, I don't know what it is. Bobby Doyle, "PHS"
My Grandpa says they should put the Pope in an ice cube and sell tickets. Logan
Tannerite solves everything. If it doesn't, you aren't using enough. Sturmwehr
Do you have any reason to suspect that your dad might be gay? Adam Corolla
If you aren't supposed to eat them, why are they made of meat? Spade
Remember, the next time you're buying a car or a pair of shoes, ask yourself "Can this stop a bullet?" Nlinc
You know what that sound is? That's the sound of you dropping on your head from 5 stories up. Phil Hendrie
Those who are willing to trade freedom for security deserve neither freedom nor security. Benjamin Franklin
In a nice vagina, it's called a cul-de-sac. Adam Carolla
You know, of course, that if you strap a slice of buttered bread, butter side up, to a cat's back and drop the cat from a high place, the cat will spin in place just above the ground. This is due to the well-established facts that (1) a cat always lands on its feet and (2) bread always lands butter side down. FLAL1A
Never gotta apologzie for laughin. Syren
I'm not gay. I just like really tight things. Call it: Equal Opportunity. Winter
There are times when one is thouroughly unconcerned with being nice... those times are satisfying. Unknown
Nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure! Ripley, "Aliens"
Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact. George Eliot
Your house is gay. It's trying to redecorate itself. Johnny_Reno
A car isn't a place of residence! If anything it was destruction of personal property...like stabbing a cat SgtAR15
Dangerous, immature, childish and well done. Da_Bunny
I would really dig a glock toilet seat, tenniferized and in tactical black. As long as it didn't KB on me while I was using it, It would be nice. fadedsun
The sex I'm familiar with does not smell. Winter
the only reason you guys collect guns is because you know that if you didnt people would shoot you Odin
I could care less how you or I actually obtain guns. Winter, to Nlinc
However, the smaller the cartridge, the smaller the margin of error. In CQB, for instance, the 155mm howitzer has a VERY good record for one shot stops Combat_Jack
I play the guitar, but Bruce Springsteen doesn't listen to me play. Why should I be subjected to his views on the validity of the war? Lt. Col. Tim Ryan
Women don't want to hear what you think. They want to hear what they think, in a deep voice. Slash-5
Admit nothing. Deny everything. Make counter-accusations (that cannot be proven untrue) / If cornered, lead the witchhunt. Words to live by
Fear the man who only owns one rifle. Odds are he has mastered that rifle. Unknown
Just beat your kid and get it over with. He's got it coming for something. Ben70
Gays are the same level of threat to society as gun owners. Enigma102083
Don't talk to me unless you speak American! Crash
Jews seem to embrace education and intellect in much the same way that many Americans of African decent seem to avoid and denounce it. It's a cultural thing. SteyrAUG
A dog callin a cop for help is like a guy with a runny nose calling Dr. Kevorkian SgtSwat
If its not gun related I dont own it... Fat_McNasty
Tie some cans of sterno to the cat. When the uprising begins, shoot the cat with a tracer, and it will provide tactical illumination as you fight your way to the main stash. Tomislav
Hitler had a lot of good ideas....he revolutionized the oven industry. Anonymous
I wish my lawn was emo, so it would cut itself. Anonymous
Be polite. Be professional. But have a plan to kill everyone you meet. NAM